This is my son.
After six weeks of grueling bed rest to keep him in the womb and then a 12 hour induction to get him out of the womb, Nathan burst forth into the world and stole mine and his Daddy’s heart.
Ever since, he has confounded us to no end. Why? Because there is no parenting book known to man that explains our son.
Our biggest issue with him…food.
Here is the look that Nathan gives us every night at the dinner table.
Nathan avoids any food that contains color. The exception to this rule is cheese. His favorite dish – kashi crackers and sliced cheese.
Our pediatrician has given us many ideas to try and we have put forth our best effort only to have each idea crash and burn.
For example, there was the “grow your own food” idea. That way, he is invested in the food and will enjoy his bounty at harvest time. He was invested alright, but his idea of bounty was watching us eating it.
Then there was the “let him cook with you” idea. Nathan was very excited about this idea and had a blast cooking. But, in the end, he plated the food and offered it to his sister. As he is a very good big brother.
After running the gamut of ideas, we had only one option left. Bribery.
Enter “blue iced star cookie”. (I would have had a picture but my husband ate the cookie.)
We have a friend who makes the best iced cookies in the whole world. But, since it takes three days to make these cookies, we only get them at Christmas and Valentine’s Day. Last Friday, we had one cookie left. A blue-iced star cookie. Nathan had been eyeing it the entire day.
Daddy and I decided to use the cookie.
We sat down to dinner. Now mind you, we had already had our daily discussion of what’s-for-dinner-I-don’t-like-that-fix-me-something-different, but this time we had ammo.
“Nathan,” I said, “here’s the deal. All you have to do is taste a piece of roast. Chew it up real fast and swallow it. Then, take half a sliced carrot and do the same. If you do that, you can have the blue-iced star cookie.”
We even put the cookie on the table so he would know the reward was real.
Dinner went as usual. Mommy, Daddy and sister ate. Nathan stared at his plate. Mommy, Daddy and sister finished their food, sister asked to be excused, Nathan stared at his plate.
Then, the bartering started.
“Why Moooommmmy, why can’t I just have the blue-iced star cookie noooowwww.”
This is now evoking not so calm responses. “Nathan, for all that is decent and holy, please eat the food. One bite son. That’s all we ask. Don’t even chew, just swallow and we’ll call it good.”
We sat for another ten minutes.
Losing all hope, I was about to clear the table when Nathan’s face lit up. He jumped out of his seat and ran around the end of the table to stand between us.
“Mommy, Daddy, here’s the deal” he started, “I am going to take the blue-iced star cookie and tear it in half. I will give one half to Daddy and one half to Mommy. Then you can eat the cookie.”
“But Nathan….” I tried to intervene.
“No Mommy, it’s okay. You guys eat the cookie. I will not eat the cookie and I will not eat the food. Okay?”
With Mommy and Daddy’s jaws on the ground, Nathan then asked to be excused from the table. No food. No cookie. May I get down now?
“Yes…..yes you may.”
Perhaps one day he’ll eat something nutritious. Until then, Kashi crackers and cheese are my specialty.